Schoolgirl Warrior Leads Cyborg Teens on Office Rampage

Sure, why not. So, picture this: a world where Japanese office dudes work literally around the clock—24/7 grind, right? Who’s gonna step up against this evil corporate monster? Well, enter this totally armed-to-the-teeth cyborg schoolgirl. Yeah, she’s gonna give those evil bots and the whole creepy org chart a good smackdown in something called Full Metal Schoolgirl.

And get this, it’s from Yuke’s. You know, the guys who do those wrestling games and Earth Defense Force spin-offs. Teaming up with D3Publisher, the ones behind that wonderfully crazy OneChanbara series. So, when the Full Metal Schoolgirl trailer dropped, it was a buffet of chaos for action game fans who love mass carnage, all wrapped in cute Japanese school uniforms. Go figure.

Anyway—wait, no—yeah, you play as one of these two robo-schoolgirls. You’re scaling this 100-story corporate beast named Meternal Jobz. The place is crawling with office zombies. I mean, “Working Dead,” they call ’em. And you’re heading for the head honcho at the top. Imagine battling your way through an ever-morphing building, busting up office drones, dodging some serious defenses, all while jazzing up your cyber-schoolgirl with fancy upgrades. Yep, it’s as wild as it sounds.

Oh, and the game doesn’t take itself too seriously, at least from what I gather. The trailer’s cheeky, especially Yuke’s English teaser. But there’s a Japanese one with this super catchy theme song that kinda steals the show.

And yeah, the schoolgirls? They’re streaming the whole rampage live—in-game, of course. Viewers chuck donations and upgrades their way, which is a nice touch. Adds a layer of fun, don’t you think?

So, if this chaos sounds like your jam, mark your calendar for October 23. It’s dropping on Nintendo Switch 2, PlayStation 5, and Windows PC via Steam and Epic Games Store. Get ready to rumble.