Sure thing, here’s a reimagined version:
So, here’s the scoop. Every week, like clockwork, Sony dishes out fresh stuff for those of us in the PlayStation universe, you know, PS4, PS5, VR, the whole shebang. It’s like they’ve got a conveyor belt of digital goodies going on. Anyway, what follows is all about the glorious PlayStation Store update, spanning the globe — kinda like a world tour, but not quite. And hey, feel free to pop by every Tuesday if you want to stay in the loop. Or don’t. Your call.
North American Update
May’s PlayStation Plus Essential Lineup:
Okay, so this month we’ve got:
- ARK: Survival Extended (PS4/PS5) — because who doesn’t want to ride dinosaurs?
- Balatro (PS4/PS5) — sounds fancy, right?
- Warhammer 40,000: Boltgun (PS4/PS5) — pew pew, blast away!
PSVR Games
Um, where did they go? Not sure what happened here, but let’s roll with it.
PS4 & PS5 Games
Here’s a random assortment of stuff you didn’t know you needed until now — maybe. Look, I got distracted. No judgments.
- Alien Rush: Remember that movie with the spaceship and the screaming? No? Just me?
- American Arcadia: Probably not what you think it is.
- Anime Girls – Fantasy Desire: I mean… okay.
- Arcade Archives NEBULASRAY: Old-school vibes, anyone?
- Aureole – Wings of Hope: Sounds uplifting. Or maybe not.
- Battle Engine Aquila: Pew pew, again?
- BRAINROT TUNG TUNG SAHUR: Tongue twister much?
- Capcom Fighting Collection 2: Remember those arcade brawls? Yeah.
- Car Parking – Garage Simulator: Because car parking is a sport.
- Cats Clean Ocean: Sea turtles are jealous.
- City Bus Manager: A game for the future urban planner in you?
- Criminal Cleaner Simulator: Mop justice. Think about it.
- Cubic Odyssey: Boxes have feelings too?
- Death Kid: Neither here nor there.
- Death Park: 4K Remaster: Ominous tingles.
- DOOM: The Dark Ages: Medieval meets futuristic nightmares.
- Drive Me Crazy: Likely too realistic for some drivers I know.
- Forgotten Fields: The name says it all.
- Garten of Banban 0: What is even? Play to find out.
- Hidden Kittens: Kingdom of Cats: Because we need more cats.
- I’m in Love With Your Dead Grandmother: Online Battle Royale: Yep, that’s a title.
- Into the Restless Ruins: Adventurous?
- IRON GUARD: Sounds tough. Probably is.
- The Jumping Peach – PS4 & PS5: Spring into action?
- KVARK: Just cool to say.
- Mythos Dash: Mythical race time.
- Neon Apex: Beyond the Limit: Go big or go home.
- Olympic Games Quiz: Get the facts, Jack.
- Pirates VR: Jolly Roger: Ahoy, VR matey!
- Project Zombie: Who doesn’t love zombies?
- Recycle Master: Save the planet, one game at a time.
- RoadCraft: Road connoisseurs rejoice.
- Shadows Over Loathing: Intrigue galore.
- Shovel Knight Dig: Digging for victories.
- Smash Drums: Rhythmic chaos.
- Super Engine GT Turbo SPEC: A car, but faster.
- Supermarket Anime Collector’s Simulator: Add it to your cart.
- SYNESTHESIA: Taste the rainbow? Not really.
- Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Splintered Fate: Cowabunga!
- TRALALERO TRALALA BACKROOMS POOLS: You had me at tralala.
- Tralalero Tralala™: Battle Royale: Chaotic, I guess?
- Trientank: Three tanks? Or a singular smorgasbord?
- TUNG SAHUR Supermarket Simulator: Finally, something we can all relate to.
- Two Strikes: That’s baseball, right? No idea.
Next Page: The European lineup. But we’ll save that for later! Or not at all. Who’s to say?
Catch you next time! Or don’t. It’s up to you.
